Where Have I Been?

Let's see...

I went to Washington, D.C. for The Rally to Restore Sanity and then my sanity buzz was killied by....

An email on Monday morning letting me know that the big boss man from the company that just bought us wanted to work with me on Thursday. 3 days fucking notice. My bowels turned to water and...

I called in lots of favors with customers and got a great day set up and then the big cheese guy emails me and says he has to be back at his office by 2:30 for a meeting so....

I scramble and switch around appointments as I field calls from my co-workers telling me things like, "you're the first rep he is working with--it is all on you", "don't fuck this up" and (my favorite from my friend Eric), "I'm rooting for you."...

Wednesday night I woke up with chills, covered in sweat. There is no calling in sick when working with the big cheese. I got up at 0530 on Thursday morning and fortified myself with cold medicine, tons of makeup and a xanax (a winning combo I might add)...

I met Big Cheese™ (he has now been capitalized and ™). I shook his hand thinking (I wonder if I should tell him I'm sick?...nah). We had a great morning as I dazzled him with my clinical knowledge and selling. He pummeled me with questions and I had all the answers. I had 2 bags--one was my purse and the other a bag I keep studies in. This way when I walked into appointments both my hands were full and I didn't need to shake hands (I have some integrity--I wasn't getting my customers sick). Then we got to the appointment with the fat italian guy...

This guy is usually ok. From the northeast. Very abrupt but reasonable. He only sees the reps he likes. Short story long, he was in a crummy mood and started giving me shit about contracts and market share. I stood up to him. We sparred. It's what I do. It was tense. Jokes were made. It was fine in the end. We had a break after that appointment and Big Cheese™ suggested we go to lunch. We get in my car and he tells me, "You frustrated that customer and you should have been quiet and just listened." I listened as he told me about the art of listening. I waited until he was finished. I was driving so I stared straight ahead. I said, "I'm embarrassed to receive that feedback from you, but I respectfully disagree." I had told him about the history with this guy and how he once told me I had "moxy" (a compliment). I said if I sat on my hands he would not have respected me. I thought to myself (fuck you dick). Thank GOD for cold medicine. At this point I am sure the xanax had worn off. I didn't need drugs. This guy was out of his league. When we walked into an operating room he was like a kid at Disneyworld for the first time. He had asked me lots of basic questions. He had worked for the same Stepford wives pharma company for 24 years...

We parted ways after lunch. I went home and got into bed without removing makeup or bra or shirt. I collapsed. The next morning I got this email from him: .

Thank you for your time and the professional manner in which you represent (I am blocking product name).  You provided me with valuable insight.  Best wishes for continued success and a successful close to 2010 business.

That's where I've been...