Sifting through the FREAKS

My friend Sandy commented that she would live vicariously through me as I sift through the freaks on match.com.

Dear Readers, I present to you Freak #1:

• 43, divorced, no kids, went to Stanford.
• Emailed back and forth. Seemed sane. Name--Chris. Cute in picture. He asked if I would be interested in talking on phone. 
• I said ok. We talk. Almost immediately he goes into a story on how he moved here from Arizona (said that is where he was from...yet he had a very southern accent) to help his sister. Apparently she went through a bad divorce from a physician. Her husband cheated on her and was leading a double life--he had a four year old child in addition to the 2 kids he had with here. Of course, I responded that is awful and I hope she is doing better.
• He proceeds to tell me how she was a size 14, depressed and her self esteem was nil.I said, "I'm sure" (thinking, can we talk about something else?) He then starts to tell me about this great personal trainer he got for her (named Jay) and how she's lost tons of weight and is now a size 6.
• At this point I am thinking of how to end the conversation. I'm at the grocery store and I tell him I need to go. He asks if he can call me later. I say no and get off the phone.

I decided that was my first brush with weirdness and move on. That night at 10:30 my phone rings from a number I don't recognize. I answer. It's "Chris' voice but says his name is Jay and he asks for me. He says he was refered to me as someone looking for a personal trainer. I tell him I can't believe he has called me at 10:30 at night and to not call me again. I hang up. My phone rings again and the number says "Blocked". I let it go to voicemail. I listen to the vm and it is "Chris" in his smooth southern accent telling me that was him that just called and he was "messing with me". He then apologizes for calling so late. I did a reverse look up on both numbers that called me. The first one was a cell with no info and the second one was Get Fit Training. I look it up and see it is owned by a guy named Jay Williams. Okay, freak alert.

Next day I go to my friend Polly's house. We go in her office and I pull up "Chris" on the computer. I start to tell her the story and she stops me. Polly finishes the story about how Chris' sister has gone through this horrible divorce from a doctor that was leading a double life. I screamed and said, "and he got her..." and Polly jumps in and says with me, "A Personal Trainer!!!" Oh my GOD. We were dying. She looks at his picture and says the guy she spoke to had a different picture.

People, I am all for marketing and getting your name out there. But trawling for clients on match.com? Really?