Junk Memories--Pyramid Marketing Schemes

I promised I would continue with pyramid marketing schemes, the camp and birthdays. Here goes with Pyramid Marketing Schemes:

• Pyramid Marketing Schemes: I have one word, Arbonne. I am fairly confident you all have a friend, family member or co-worker that has tried to sell it to you. Penelope disclaimer--if you sell Arbonne, please don't be offended. I am writing about my experience with Annie selling it. It all started with Annie telling me she was starting to use a great new skin product line. That she had spent money on Obagi and never got results like she got with Arbonne. She said she would give me a starter kit. I told her I was fine with what I was using. I had never heard of Arbonne, but I knew I sounded like some bullshit. I had a facial appointment the next week. I told my girl about it. She died laughing and said that all her clients were asking her about it. She researched the company and it was a typical pyramid deal. I went home and googled it. I was amazed at all the negative posts about it. Mother's Day rolls around. I get a gift bag from Annie. It is the frickin Arbonne Starter Kit!!! She had a lovely note thanking me for being a wonderful step mom to the boys AND an order form for products. Walk to garage, open door, open trash bin, toss bag and contents, go to phone and call Sulie, laugh hysterically. A month goes by and I get an email from Annie asking me if I wanted to order. She has attached a picture of a nasty before and after foot picture that supposedly shows the amazing results of Arbonne. Thanks to google I just found the pictures online!:

I got a solution for nasty ass feet like that--take a shower and scrub them. God, nasty! Needless to say, there was no ordering from me. Instead I forwarded the email to my esthetician for her amusement. She forwarded to her entire spa. It ended up on the breakroom wall.

• Arbonne lost out to a mortgage pay off scheme. John tells me one night that he is going to watch a video on paying off your mortgage really fast. I handled the bills and I would always make extra payments when I could. I had read about what to do to pay your mortgage off in less time. He tells me that Annie is now selling a program where you can pay off a 30 year mortgage in 5 years. I bust out laughing. John says he thinks it sounds good and he is interested. I ask how much this "program" costs. He says, $3,500. I say I have a better idea--send that to Chase. That night at dinner one of the twins tells us that, "Mom wanted me to make sure you are going to her dinner program tomorrow." OMG--she is now using her kids to promote the latest, wacko get rich scheme! I smile and say thank you to H. After dinner I tell John I have no interest in spending my night off listening to a huckster. He gets mad and says I should be more open minded.
• Facial Peels: Now she sells some type of facial peels at "Peel Parties." Lawd.

Another Penelope Disclaimer: Annie was wonderful to me after the whole John debacle. I am recounting our history to put some color on why I felt weird when she just sent me pictures of the boys. As I look back, I realize I could have done a blog on being a new step mom. Now that is a whole other talkshow!