A walk down junk memory lane

I am thinking I could write a book on being a step parent. Writing this stuff has brought up some things I hadn't thought of in a while. Moving on to "The Camp". There was  a "camp crowd". Most were couples that had been friends with John since college. That also means they knew Annie and had attended weddings, baptisms, and holiday celebrations for 15-20 years. All born and raised in either Baton Rouge or New Orleans. Enter me...born and raised in Florida. Never had a "boil" or ate crawfish. I sounded like a "Midwest Newscaster" according to a Cajun oil rig worker I sat next to on a plane one morning...

• Dan and Maria: Dan worked with us. I still can't decide if he is a good guy or an ass. He was the only one from the group that checked up me after I moved to Florida. My friend Debra made the astute comment--Dan is the longest relationship John has ever had. Maria never tried to get to know me. I did not have biological children so I had no value. She would talk down to me. She would come in the kitchen and show me how to cut tomatoes. She bored me to tears. Dan used to out the moves on women at work meetings. I am fairly certain he is cut from the same cheetah print cloth that John is cut from.
• Mick and Laura: Mick liked me. He did call me while I was still in Louisiana and told me how sorry he was. Laura called me and cried. Still they were the people that stuck with John when he cheated on Annie. They never checked on me again. Laura is buds with Maria. Their conversations made me want to scream. I used to feel like I was gasping for air.
• Todd and Natalie: Todd is the DA for Springfield Parish. A local celebrity of sorts. He is a decent guy. One day we were all out at the pool. I got up to go to the bathroom, Natalie said, "Penelope, bring me a diet coke when you come back." Yessa Massa. WTF? I had fantasies of wearing a maid's uniform when they would come out. Maybe I should have just peed in the pool.

I can't tell you how many times I heard references to the fun times they had with Annie. One day in the pool Laura admitted to me that they were all skeptical of me because I was "another one of John's women." She then told me she saw how the boys loved me and realized I was "different than the others." Gee, thanks.

We would go out there almost every weekend. This meant feeding and entertaining. (Translation, Penelope going to grocery and paying. Penelope making food with my new "friends" sitting at the bar stools critiquing. John making daiquiris and being Mr. Party). Oh my...I have forgotten how bad it sucked. At least they would clean up. I used to beg John to have a quiet weekend. His reply, Baby, these are our friends..." I learned how to host a boil and I can eat crawfish like I was born on the bayou. It is a barbaric affair where newspapers are laid out on the patio table and potatoes, corn and crawfish are poured out. Everyone stands and eats. Have you ever gnawed on a potato while standing? There would be serious discussions on the price of a bushel of crawfish. Were they better at the boil at Alan's last week or at Bobby's the week before? I would want to impale myself on a rusty fork! In retrospect I think it must look like a creepy scene from Lord Of the Flies...

Oh, but this is not the theme of this post. Annie would have weekends at the camp. It was while we weren't out there BUT...She would bring her friends. It was creepy weird. There's our bathroom with my stuff under the sink (hairdryer, tampons, makeup, etc) , the master bedroom with my clothes in the closet and dresser...our bed. YUCK! I told John I felt like it was not respecting the boundaries of our marriage. I felt like it blurred things for the boys. It took a while and John finally  agreed. He had to tell her that things had changed. I never asked how the conversation went. All I wanted was to not feel like a visitor in my own life!

Have you ever looked back at a chapter in your life and wondered how you kept from screaming?