Barely Breathing

I drove home from Ft. Lauderdale yesterday and made it in time to get to a concert. Sulie and I went to see Duncan Sheik. I have always loved him and this is the second time I've seen him. I ran into my house, did some dry cleaning (put on antiperspirant and changed shirts), brushed my teeth and we left. When we got to the performing arts center we saw that the opening band was an ensemble that played Radiohead songs. Sulie and I decided to sit outside while the opening band played. I love Radiohead, but listening to someone playing screeching violin doing their songs was too much. We saw a group of older people (in their 50s-70's) sitting on a bench next to us. Sulie commented that they were "Rockers". I wondered why they were at the show too. All of a sudden I look up and there is Duncan Sheik. This was his family. We were quiet voyeurs as they kissed and hugged. His Grandma said, "Good Luck Dunky" as he walked away. After he went back stage we talked to his Grandma, Mother and Aunt. They were so proud.

Sulie and I went in and found our seats. It was in one of the smaller halls and we were really close to the stage. 3 young kids (I can say that now) sat in front of us. They were 16 or 17. Two girls and one boy. The boy had a headband on and seemed to be having a great time. Duncan came onstage and started to play. He was so cute. As the show went on he said, "I'm going to play some old songs and some covers." The girl sitting in front of me yelled out, "play some old songs from the album with Barely Breathing on it." He laughed and commented, "I'm going to play songs from the 80's and from the sound of your voice that was before you were born." The crowd laughed. She replied, "My Mom used to play the CD when she cleaned the house." There was more laughter. Duncan (who I've read is a Buddhist, seemed kind of ill at ease) replied, "that is why I make music so people will be more productive." Even more laughter. I heard her little voice say, "no the lyrics helped me with relationships." She had on a jacket that had a hood. At that point she slunk down in her seat and put the hood on. I said, "he didn't mean to hurt your feelings." We were in such a small place it was easy to be heard. I said out loud, "you didn't hear what she said after..." At that point they started to play again. The young girl told me, "it's okay." I started to wonder what was going through her head. The seat was 40 bucks--that is a lot of money for a teenager to pay. What was she hoping for at this concert? Did she want to return to the feeling of safety she had as a child while her Mom played the CD? I thought about his lyrics (lots of them are about heartbreak) and wondered if she was sad. I watched her remove and put the hood back on several times during the concert. When they started to play Barely Breathing I expected her to jump up. She sat still with the hood on her head. I know all the words to the song, but I had never really thought about them...

Cause I am barely breathing

And I can't find the air

Don't know who I am kidding

Imagining you care

And I could stand here waiting

A fool for another day

I don't suppose it's worth the prize and worth the price

The price that I would pay

After the show I let his Aunt know what the young girl had said about the lyrics helping her with relationships. I told her it was cute, but what she said was very sad. The Aunt agreed. I hope she tells her nephew.